Deceased August 17, 2003

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In Memory

Our class only recently learned that the cremains of Dave Reay, soccer co-captain and president of Theta Delta Chi, were laid to rest on Aug. 7, 2004, in Martinsburg, W.V. Our class had strangely, but certainly lost touch with Dave over the past five years or so. As a West Virginian, a Theta Delt, and one of many classmates out of touch with Dave, it fell upon me to investigate.  Sadly, I found that Dave’s last years, much like those of his senior year roommates, Ted Clarke ’69 and Jeff Jackson ’69, were not his best years. As his life and spirit declined, Dave slipped out of touch with those of us who reasonably assumed that he would remain a vibrant, athletic, jovial leader for all his years.

Dave succumbed to a massive heart attack on Aug. 17, 2003. As we noted at our 25th Reunion, Dave carried far too much weight over the last decade of his life, a far sight from the lean, shoulders back, six-footer we remember on the soccer fields and around campus. Dave lived most of his life on Long Island, N.Y., and worked with Irving Trust, Chase Manhattan Bank and its successor, J. P. Morgan Chase, in the 1980’s and 1990’s. Dave left J. P. Morgan Chase around 2000 and reportedly was not employed thereafter. Lethargy ensued, which put understandable strains on his family. Dave was reported to be living alone during the last months of his life. Newsday reported that a funeral service was held on Long Island, followed by cremation. Nearly a year later, Dave’s daughter, his aunt and other family members interred his ashes beside his mother’s grave in Martinsburg, W.V.

Dave’s father enrolled with the Amherst Class of 1939 but left after a year and graduated from West Virginia University. His son, our classmate, fulfilled his father’s promise, by graduating from Amherst, majoring in political science. At Garden City, Long Island, High School, Dave was a standout soccer player. At Amherst, Dave was a solid, steady, albeit quiet leader from the outset. Teammate Rob Klugman ’69 remembers that Dave was neither the fastest, nor the most skilled of players, but that he was an incredibly reliable, effective player, making very few mental or physical mistakes. Following outstanding seasons in 1966 and 1967 and teams loaded with talent, the 1968 Amherst soccer team welcomed a young new coach (Peter Gooding). Given the departed talent, the expectations were quite modest. Klugman reports that the returning players introduced Coach Gooding to the co-captains they had chosen, without input from their new mentor—Dave Reay and Guy Bramble ’69. That unheralded 1968 team exceeded all expectations, losing only a single game.

Guy Bramble ’69 recalls that “for four years we played soccer together, serving as co-captains of the 1968 varsity squad, so I know a little bit about his passion for the game and his compassion for his teammates. What I remember best about David—what made him such an appealing personality—were his warmth, his sincerity and his easy laughter; but what I respected most in his character was David’s dogged commitment to see a thing through. While the rest of us were grousing about Scully Scandrett’s brutal conditioning drills in freshman soccer, it was all water off the proverbial duck’s back for David. Maybe it was easier for him; or maybe it just wasn’t in him to complain. Whatever the case, I always admired his ability to look adversity in the eye without blinking or averting his steady gaze.

“The heart of David’s leadership lay in his earnestness and his ability to move people to his side. These qualities were never more needed than they were after the MIT game, when he went to Peter Gooding’s office to fight for his teammate (Mark Coffin ’71) and for his team. I’ve never had the illusion that Mark Coffin’s ultimate reinstatement was a function of David’s debating acumen; on the contrary, I’ve long believed that Peter Gooding seized an opportunity to win his captains’ respect and to add to our stature as team leaders by “bowing” to our petition for clemency. Whatever was on Peter’s mind, David and I left his office relieved that we had won a second chance for Mark and for the team.”

Guy concludes, “A lot of us who waged that 1968 campaign with David will be especially saddened at the news that David has turned in his uniform for the last time. I wish there were someone I could see about it; I’d like to argue for David’s reinstatement, as he did for Mark Coffin. And I’d argue passionately for him, because he inspired all of us to be better players and better men. We’re diminished by his passing.”

Senior year, Dave was elected president of Theta Delta Chi. After years of saying we should do so, finally our leader led us out of national fraternity affiliation. We became, simply, Theta Delta. Dave reasoned that the exchange of several hundred dollars, for a few pledge pins, seemed pretty one-sided. Once again, Dave was effective.

So far as I know, Dave and I are the only Air Force pilots from our class. A couple of years after graduation, Dave went to Air Force Officer Training School, completed pilot training and served as an instructor pilot in T-37s for four years. He had the good sense to serve his duty stateside, during the turbulent early 1970’s.

We fondly remember, from our early reunions, Dave’s lovely wife Kathy, certainly a trooper under difficult circumstances. Dave is also survived by sons Brian, a law student, and Thomas, a high school student, by a daughter, Jennifer Nunez, and by two sisters. To his family, Amherst and the Class of 1969 send our belated heartfelt condolences, our thanks to each of you for sharing Dave’s good years with us, and our sincere regrets that we and Dave were unable get our good hearts and souls together during his final years. Might we remember Dave Reay, and his departed roommates, by pledging, one to another, to reach out when we know that we need a hand.

Richard M. “Kit” Francis ’69